But speaking sweeter doesn’t always come naturally, does it? It is much easier to be negative, cynical, complaining and critical of the world and people around us. With everything going on in the world, with all the difficulties of this life, with all the admittedly dumb things people constantly do, speaking sweeter is not something always coming naturally or easily.
I know this is a hare-brained idea, but wouldn’t it be great if somebody invented a slick machine to help us stop complaining? Wouldn’t it be useful to have some sort of training device to help guide us on a path toward speaking only sweetness? Let’s think about that…
Okay, maybe that isn’t such a great idea. Maybe this speaking sweetly business is just like all the rest of the following Jesus stuff. Maybe we should just go back to the Book again. Open your Bibles to 1 Thessalonians 5:1-11, page 1082 in your pew Bibles. Interestingly, the Apostle Paul is writing to a group of people who are confused about how much time they had left. They were wondering about how soon Jesus would return. So Paul explained things.
Now, brothers and sisters, about times and dates we do not need to write to you, for you know very well that the day of the Lord will come like a thief in the night. While people are saying, “Peace and safety,” destruction will come on them suddenly, as labor pains on a pregnant woman, and they will not escape. But you, brothers and sisters, are not in darkness so that this day should surprise you like a thief. You are all children of the light and children of the day. We do not belong to the night or to the darkness. So then, let us not be like others, who are asleep, but let us be awake and sober. For those who sleep, sleep at night, and those who get drunk, get drunk at night. But since we belong to the day, let us be sober, putting on faith and love as a breastplate, and the hope of salvation as a helmet. For God did not appoint us to suffer wrath but to receive salvation through our Lord Jesus Christ. He died for us so that, whether we are awake or asleep, we may live together with him. Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
As we studied Romans 13:11-12 last week, we saw the same themes emphasized there we see here. Live with a clear sense of urgency, eternity and priority. Don’t waste a moment!
But it is the last verse of this passage drawing our attention this morning. In light of all these urgent, eternal things, stop worrying and grousing; encourage one another and build each other up. The Bible has a great deal to say about different way to encourage and build others up, but I’d like to suggest just three critically important steps for us to work on today.
Be Grateful
I suspect the first one might be the most important. The more I study Scripture and the longer I spend in ministry, the more I’m coming to believe that much of the bitterness in our speech and behavior comes from our own ingratitude. We are cranky, cynical, complaining, mean and bitter toward the world and each other mostly because we’ve lost our gratitude. We’ve forgotten all God has done for us. We’ve forgotten the blessings God has poured out on us. We’ve stopped appreciating God and the people around us for all the good they genuinely bring into our lives. And so speaking sweetly becomes something we have to work at doing instead of something flowing happily out of us naturally as we live, move and have our being. And unless we make a conscious choice to reject ingratitude and concentrate on all the things for which we should be grateful, we will always struggle to speak sweetly into the world.
The world around us does not want us to be grateful. This world wants you and I to believe our church is second rate, our job is pointless, our car is slow and ugly, our skin is flawed, our body deformed, our bank account small and our country pathetic. This world does not want me grateful for my wife or children. This world does not want me happy with my five year old Suzuki or small apartment. The devil doesn’t want us to be grateful for anything!
But that isn’t the message of the Bible. God tells us to be grateful for everything! Paul challenges us in Colossians 2:7 to let our “lives overflow with thanksgiving for all He has done.” The Bible begs us to understand that our satisfaction is where our sweet speech is born. If I’m filled with gratitude, sweetness follows. Gratitude is the foundation for all speaking sweetly.
Centuries ago, St. Benedict took sins of ingratitude far more seriously than we typically do today. Grumbling was a serious offense against community life. In his rule for monastic living, St. Benedict said, “First and foremost, there must be no word or sign of grumbling, no manifestation of it for any reason at all.” And good Benedict took this so seriously that he also included a wonderful line in his guidebook describing the appropriate response to a monk who was creating discord by grumbling and ingratitude. “Let Father Abbot send two stout monks to explain the matter to him!” Complaining and whining in a monastery got you a couple of monk bouncers named Bruno and Guido! Perhaps this would be a good solution here today…
Maybe not. But what do you think Paul meant in 1 Thessalonians 5:18, when he said, “Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” Are there any exceptions listed there? Of course we’re going to go through tough things, difficult situations and painful disagreements as we struggle to follow Jesus together. But don’t let anything steal away your gratitude – gratitude is foundational for any ability to speak sweetly.
Be Encouraging
The second speaking sweetly choice we need to make relates to encouragement.
We speak sweeter to the world around us when, overwhelmed with gratitude for God and others, we consciously and constantly make the decision to be an encouragement to the people God has placed around us. Speaking sweeter means choosing to be encouraging.
Understand the power God has placed in each of us. Understand the importance of just one kind word at just the right moment. Understand the incredible power of the tongue.
I wonder if any of us fully understand the power Almighty God has placed in our tongue. It is almost creepy, isn’t it? I am honestly and regularly unnerved by the power of the tongue. The tongue has the power to destroy or build up. I can wreck someone for years with a bitter comment, but just one encouraging word can also sustain someone for years. As Mother Teresa once said, “Kind words can be short and easy to speak but their echoes are truly endless.” God has given each of us stunning power to encourage others around us. Use it!Anybody remember Norm Peterson from the old sitcom Cheers? I loved Norm. I am still deeply grateful for my buddy Norm! Norm was a perennially unhappy guy, swilling beer, miserably married, miserably employed, yet always making people laugh. Remember his most famous quotation? Somebody asked Norm how his day went and Norm responded, “It’s a dog-eat-dog world and I’m wearing milk bone underwear.” I wonder how many people around us are like old beaten down, beaten up Norm from Cheers? Don’t you think that’s the way many people around us experience the world each day? Don’t you think an encouraging word makes a difference to the shattered people around you? Of course it does, so encourage them!
Let’s face it. Any idiot can sit back and find what’s wrong with a situation. Any idiot can easily find fault in someone else if that’s all you’re looking for. It doesn’t take hardly any sort of intelligence at all to poke holes in the world around us. Anyone can come in here on any given Sunday and make a list of every last little thing that doesn’t measure up somehow. We can pick apart the sermon, ignore the Sunday school classes, mock the struggling leadership, sniff at the singing and perhaps be completely correct in every one of our critical assessments. We can go out these doors and rail against the government, criticize our boss and coworkers, pick apart our spouse and children and perhaps be technically correct in every word we say.
But that isn’t how Jesus behaves. That isn’t living like we were dying. That isn’t speaking sweetly. Our LORD Jesus taught us how to speak sweetly. Jesus spoke encouraging words from a wellspring of love and gratitude for people. Jesus saw the longing, broken heart inside the icky tax collector everyone despised and he said, “Zaccheus, you come down from that tree. I’m going to your house for lunch today. You matter. Your life counts. You are valuable. I have time for you. I see potential and possibility in you. I’m excited about you. I want to be with you!” Jesus saw past the ever-present, inevitable weaknesses and reached out to encourage. He noticed the bleeding woman in the teeming crowd and stopped to encourage her. Jesus spoke sweetly. Jesus encouraged. Jesus was lavish with his encouragement.
You have an extra insert in your bulletin this morning. Please take advantage of that. When you go home this afternoon, take that little encouragement slip of paper out of your Bible and write a note to someone. Take the time to tell somebody why they matter. And then put that note in the mail. Your scribbled encouragement might be the one thing they need to get through a difficult time. Speaking sweetly means being intentional about encouragement.
Be Praying
Then third and finally, be praying for people. As the writer to the Hebrews encourages, “Come boldly to the throne of our gracious God.” Bring the people around you boldly to the throne of God. The New Testament tells us we have all been made priests, by the power of the Holy Spirit within us, to intercede for others around us. We are grateful, we are encouraging and we are constantly speaking the names of others sweetly to God in prayer. The Apostle Paul tells us in Ephesians 6:18 we are to “pray in the Spirit at all times and on every occasion. Stay alert and be persistent in your prayers for all Christians everywhere.” I wonder if perhaps the sweetest way of speaking to people might actually be to speak to God about people.
One of my favorite writers on prayer, Jim Cymbala of the Brooklyn Tabernacle, told the story of his wayward daughter Chrissy in his book Fresh Wind, Fresh Fire twelve years ago. After two and half years of agonizing over her awful behavior, the entire church stopped what they were doing one Tuesday evening and held a prayer meeting for her. Thirty two hours later, on a Thursday morning, their broken daughter showed up at their home unannounced, tearfully wanting to know who had been praying for her on Tuesday evening. She had a dramatic experience of God at the very moment the entire church was on its face praying for her. She turned her life around and hasn’t looked back since.
While not every prayer story has a dramatic ending like that, every prayer story matters like that. Every prayer we offer on behalf of another person is sweet speech into the heart of God. And as a bonus, when we are genuinely praying for someone with whom we may have a personal difficulty, prayer also serves as a healing balm on our relationship with that person. It is almost impossible to pray for someone for very long and continue to be mad at them. Prayer is not only sweet speech on their behalf; it is sweet speech onto our wounded heart as well.
A doctoral student was speaking to visiting lecturer Albert Einstein at Princeton in 1952 and somewhat arrogantly asked, “Sir, what is there left in the world for original dissertation research?” Einstein immediately replied, “Find out about prayer. Somebody must find out about prayer.” There is something mysteriously powerful about prayer we need to investigate.
Eugene Peterson, in his book Earth and Altar, says “Prayer is political action. Prayer is social energy. Prayer is public good. Far more of our nation's life is shaped by prayer than is formed by legislation. That we have not collapsed into anarchy is due more to prayer than to the police. Prayer is a sustained and intricate act of patriotism in the largest sense of that word--far more precise, loving, and preserving than any patriotism served up in slogans. That society continues to be livable and that hope continues to be resurgent are attributable to prayer far more than to business prosperity or a flourishing of the arts. The single most important action contributing to whatever health and strength there is in our land is prayer.”
Norma Goodrich told the story, in an old Christian Reader, of a visit with her daughter's family, “My husband went into the bedroom to pray. Our curious 3-year-old granddaughter followed him and came out saying, “Grandpa’s in there praying, and there isn't even any food!” Folks; prayer is not supposed to be just a traditional, mealtime deal! Prayer is the sweetest speech of faith. So pray for the people around you. Be praying.
If we are honestly interested at all in truly living like we were dying, we will learn how to speak sweetly into the world and into the lives around us. We will be lavishly grateful to God and others. We will be aggressively encouraging and we will be constantly praying.
May the LORD bless you and keep you! May the LORD make his face shine upon you and be gracious to you! May the LORD turn his face toward you and give you peace! May the LORD speak sweetly to you as you begin to speak sweetly to others!
Amen.
